How to behave decently at the table in different situations. How to behave at the table or how to create a beautiful impression of yourself

Some rules of behavior at the table are dictated by common sense and are quite understandable, for example, do not talk while eating, do not eat with a knife, while others contain their own, inexplicable at first glance, nuances. What are all these subtleties and what generally accepted rules of etiquette exist - read on.

How to sit at the table

The rules of conduct begin with how you need to sit at the table - you need to do this at a convenient distance from the dining table. The back should be straight. Keep your legs bent next to you, do not straighten them to their full length under the table. Where you sit is determined by the hosts in preparation for the reception.

Hands are held in a bent form, at the level of cutlery. Only hands can be kept on the table. Don't put your elbows on the table! You can’t figure out where to put your hands - fold them on your knees.

During a conversation, it is customary to turn your head to the interlocutor, and not the whole body. Speak in a restrained tone and do not gesticulate actively.

What to do with a napkin

The etiquette of behavior at the table always assumes that the dishes for the guest are served with a napkin. In addition to its main function of keeping the hands and mouth clean, it serves as a sign of the beginning of the meal, when the host of the evening puts it on his lap.


A large napkin is left on your knees folded in half, a smaller napkin is unfolded completely. If the napkin is served in a ring, then you remove it and leave it in the upper corner to the left of your plate.

Wipe your fingers and lips with it as needed. When you need to leave, the napkin stays on your seat. Leave the used napkin at the plate, trying to wrap the soiled places inside, or, if possible, put it into the ring in the same form.

At the end of the meal, the napkin should lie on the left side of your plate - no need to fold it, wrinkle it too, just gently place it on the side. The plate has already been taken away - leave the napkin exactly in its place.

How to use cutlery

Studying the rules of conduct at the table, many, first of all, are afraid a large number cutlery. In fact, they are not so difficult to remember, especially since they are rarely used all at once. There is one tip that will make it easier for you if you set the table correctly: you should always start with the appliances located farthest from the plate and work towards the main appliances that lie next to the plate.


Hold the fork with your left hand. The tines of the fork should point down. When pricking food, you can lean with your index finger on the junction between the handle and the teeth, but away from the latter. When using only the fork, it can be held in the right hand.


Take the knife with your right hand, clasping it with your middle, ring and little fingers, the thumb supports the knife from below, and the index finger rests on the handle, but not on the back of the blade. Never hold a knife like a pencil. Eating with a knife is unacceptable, but above all, dangerous.


Hold the spoon between your index and thumb, by the middle of the handle.


If the device fell on the floor, do not continue to use it, but apologize to the owner and ask for a new one.

Serve food from common dishes not with individual appliances, but with serving ones.

You need to hold any glass exclusively by the leg, so as not to heat the drink with your fingers. The cup is held by the handle. When taking a sip, it is customary to look into the cup, and not over it and at others.

How to use chopsticks

The use of chopsticks implies separate rules. If you don't know how to hold the chopsticks correctly, then practice in advance, for example, with the help of this video.

When you're not using your chopsticks, place them on a special stand or to the right of your plate.


In no case should you cross the chopsticks on a plate, leave them in food and pierce it.

Rules of conduct while eating

  • Do not scatter food and leftovers on your plate. If you come across a bone or other inedible element, do not spit it out, but gently place it with your lips on a napkin and fold it near the plate.
  • Do not try to talk with a full mouth - food must first be completely chewed and swallowed. It is considered good form not to make any sounds while eating - do not slurp, do not smack your lips, do not suck drinks noisily. Loudly knocking cutlery on the dishes is also not very decent.

  • Do not cut all the meat or fish into pieces at once. Cut off only one piece at a time before you eat it and cut off the next one.
  • Scoop soup with a spoon only in the direction away from you. Tilt the plate to make it more convenient to scoop up the remnants of the soup, you can also only in this direction. When you fill your spoon with food, do it in such a way that you can carry it to your mouth without ruining the tablecloth. Do not blow on a spoon with hot food.
  • When eating, do not tilt your head to the plate, but bring food to your mouth with the help of utensils.
  • You can’t reach across the table to take food - ask the person sitting closer to pass the necessary and be sure to thank him. Take only what you can safely reach, sitting straight, or slightly leaning to the side.

Take your time

When you're the host, keep an eye on the overall pace of your meal, pause after each spoonful or sip so you don't get too ahead of your guests and make them feel like they're being rushed.


As a guest, in the same way, do not rush to quickly absorb food, show the host that you enjoy not only food, but the company is also interesting to you.

How to leave the table

If you need to go to the toilet, apologize to those present and say that you need to go out.

When you need to leave the company for good (for example, you don’t feel well, or you got a call and urgently called somewhere), apologize to those present and say that you would still be happy to stay if it weren’t for force majeure.

Restaurant etiquette

Rules of conduct at the table are common to all, although restaurant etiquette has its own nuances associated with the specifics of service.

  • It is not necessary to call the waiter by shouting. Ideally, try to make eye contact. Otherwise, raise your hand with your index finger up to get attention. In some restaurants, special call buttons are starting to appear right on the table - then use it.
  • When sending back poorly prepared or spoiled food, it is polite to tell your company that they can start eating without waiting for you.
  • In the event that you ordered wine, but you did not like it, you do not have the right to return it, because a bottle has already been opened for you. But if the wine is really that awful, you can try to talk delicately to your waiter and explain the situation.

  • If you want to try someone's dish, then don't reach for someone else's plate across the table - have some food to sample served to you in a bread plate. In the case of a formal, business dinner or with unfamiliar people, it is better to leave this idea.
  • Many people forget about this, or even simply do not know, but putting a mobile phone on the dining table is just as wrong as a handbag or keys. In addition to the fact that this item has nothing to do with the meal, it distracts you from both food and your company. As well as according to the rules of theatrical etiquette, it is advisable to put the phone on silent mode in a restaurant, because you are also in a cultural institution.

  • Girls who want to freshen up their make-up can quickly and gently update their lipstick after dinner is over, but that's about it. For the rest, it’s better to use the ladies’ room, putting on all the makeup at the table is bad form.

You can watch the following video about table manners when going to a restaurant.

Can I take pictures of food?

With development social networks and increasing their influence on everyday life, it has become very popular to photograph a dish before eating, and sometimes not only young people do this, but also people of other ages. The question began to arise whether such actions are allowed by the culture of behavior at the table.


It's hard to resist this trend, so if you want to take a photo of your food, you can do it, but make sure you don't disturb anyone and your companions don't mind, and don't leave your camera on the table after taking a photo. Do not use the flash and turn off the shutter sound effect. The same rules of conduct apply to your selfies - try not to cause discomfort to others and do not turn this venture into a photo shoot.

There is a so-called Silent Service Code - certain rules for folding cutlery during and at the end of a meal in order to demonstrate to the waiter your opinion about the service, readiness to move on to the next dish, etc.

  • Pause in eating: cross the knife and fork towards each other, the knife points to the handle to the right, the fork to the left. Use only one device - put it on the edge of the plate, resting the handle looking to the right on the table.
  • I am waiting for the next dish: cross the knife and fork on the plate at a right angle, perpendicular to each other; the fork faces north, the knife faces west.
  • The meal is over, the plate can be taken away: there are several ways to show this, the main thing is to put the cutlery between ten and four o'clock, if you think of the plate as a dial. But most often the knife and fork are folded parallel to each other in the five o'clock direction, in the European (continental) style - with the teeth down, in the American - up.
  • The meal is over, you liked the dish: you want to show appreciation for Tasty food- then, at the end of the meal, put the cutlery parallel to each other and across the plate, in a horizontal position.
  • The meal is over, the dish did not like: suppose you did not like the food and you want to demonstrate it - cross the cutlery in such a way that the knife clings to the tines of the fork.

Etiquette for children

The rules of behavior at the table for children are not particularly different from the rules for adults, the task is to be able to intelligibly tell the child about this. He is unlikely to be interested in dry text from a book, therefore it is better to approach the explanation in a playful way, using children's puzzles, songs, riddles and other techniques - for example, colorful pictures with poems on table etiquette that can be easily learned will be very by the way.


And most of all, kids will like instructive and funny videos, where the rules of behavior at the table are presented in a playful or entertaining form, for example, like this:

We hope that our material was able to shed light on the culture of behavior at the table, and the corresponding rules of etiquette will no longer be a mystery to you.

The etiquette includes great amount all sorts of rules and subtleties that are very difficult to remember. However, it is essential to know the rules of conduct for those situations in which a person finds himself most often. So, it is worth learning how to behave at the table.

How to sit correctly

You have to sit nicely at the table. You can not fall apart on a chair, as if it were your home chair. Sit on the edge of a chair with your back straight and legs straight. No need to move very close to the table and even more so to lean on it with your chest. You should sit in such a way that it is comfortable for you to eat, and at the same time not feel any constraint in movement. In accordance with generally accepted standards, a distance equal to the palm of your hand should remain between the table and the person. The plate should be placed on the table at a distance of two fingers from its edge.

Basic rules of table etiquette

The rules of table etiquette strictly forbid putting your elbows on the table. You can put your hands on it. Between meals, hands should be folded on your knees or on the armrests of the chair. Sitting at the table, you need to unfold the cloth napkin located next to your plate and place it on your lap. It is worth noting that the main purpose of this napkin is to protect clothes and prevent them from getting dirty. Hands should be wiped only with paper napkins. They also need to blot the mouth, do not wipe, namely blot, gently touching the lips.

Cutlery

The rules that describe how to behave at the table state that the knife and spoon must be held in the right hand, and the fork in the left. It will be useful to know that the cutlery folded crosswise on the plate means that you have decided to take a break. If you want the waiter to remove the cutlery or replace the dish, you should place a fork and knife diagonally parallel to each other. Their handles should look in the lower right corner. Cutlery stacked on a plate indicates your desire to pause. It should be noted that after the first dish is eaten, it is necessary to leave the spoon in the plate. Meat, poultry and fish should be eaten with a knife and fork. The bones should be removed from the mouth not with your fingers, but with a fork, carefully setting them aside.

Eat carefully

No need to bite too big chunks food should be chewed with the mouth closed. While eating, you can not talk, slurp, sip and blow on hot food. In addition, it is indecent to discuss treats and choose the most appetizing piece on a common plate. In the event that you cannot take a dish, you should politely ask the person sitting next to you to pass it. When thinking about how to properly behave at the table, do not forget about the polite attitude towards your companions. While at the table, you can not laugh out loud and talk with your mouth full. You need to respect your companions: do not smoke in front of them, do not talk on the phone, and do not gesticulate.

Refusal of a meal

  • If you want to refuse some food that you do not like or that may cause you an allergy, then it is worth politely refusing: "No, thank you." But still, the rules of good manners recommend that you take at least a small piece from the dish and place it on the plate in such a way that it is not noticeable that you have not touched it.
  • Undoubtedly, any hostess will be upset if she notices that you have not tried any dish. In this case, you do not need to loudly explain what the reason is. It is necessary, without attracting the attention of the rest of those sitting at the table, in a low voice to explain to her why you refused to eat: you are on a diet, you are allergic to certain types of products, your doctor does not recommend them to you.
  • If you refuse a dish that the waiter offers, you just need to shake your head or say in a low voice: "No, thanks." In the case when you are present at an "a la buffet" dinner, where several dishes are offered at once, you can put on your plate just what you like best. However, if at such a dinner waiters are standing at the table with appetizers, then you need to point them to the dish you like, stretch your plate forward, smile and kindly ask them to put the dish you have chosen. If you notice that you were about to put something that you didn’t ask for, you should say: “No, thanks” and repeat your previous request.

Now you know how to behave at the table to create a good impression of yourself. Remember that by following the elementary rules of etiquette, you can attract attention to yourself and achieve the location of others. Try it and see for yourself!

But here few people understood them in more detail. For many, it is sufficient that they know in which hand to hold a knife and in which to hold a fork. However, this is very little. In this article I want to talk about how to behave at the table correctly.

About etiquette

First of all, it must be said that there are different types behavior in this or that institution and even in this or that country. If you figure out how beautiful it is to eat, this question will be completely the same for European countries, in which you need to be at least quiet at the table, and for Asian ones, where thanks to the owner for delicious dinner expressed with loud champs and smacks. Also, behavior in a restaurant and visiting relatives at the table may differ slightly.

Restaurant etiquette

Understanding how beautiful it is is very important for those people who visit various restaurants from time to time. So, here it is important to behave correctly immediately after crossing the threshold of the institution. It is important to remember that the head waiter meets guests, tells if there are free seats, and takes them to the desired table. It is also his duty to pick up the outerwear of visitors. Approaching the table, a man (if guests of different sexes have come) must first help the lady sit down, pushing her chair a little, then he sits down himself. It is also important to remember how to sit at the table correctly. As for the position, the representative of the stronger sex should be opposite the woman or to her left. If the lady is a little late, the man can take a seat at the table, but when the head waiter takes her to the appointed place, the guy will definitely stand up as a sign of respect.

Order selection

When the couple is already at the table, the waiter is sure to serve the menu. It is not customary to rush to choose the desired dishes, in such establishments it is not customary to rush. Most often, the waiter will see that the guests are ready to order something, and he himself will come. But you can also call the attendants to you with a slight movement of your hand. The order is made first by a woman, only then - by a man. However, a lady can ask a guy to do it for her, this is also allowed. If the guests cannot decide on the choice of wine, they can ask the waiter for advice. You can also consult with him about a particular dish, this is allowed by the rules of etiquette.

Expectation

How to behave at the table while the order has not yet arrived? At this time, guests can quietly communicate. The waiter will most likely bring the wine first. Only a restaurant employee uncorks bottles; a man should not take off from his place to do this. First, the drink is served to the ladies, then to the guys. As for food, you can start eating only after everyone at the table already has ordered dishes.

Rules

Understanding how beautiful it is to eat, it is also important to remember that in restaurants it is strictly forbidden to pick up fallen objects from the floor. The waiter will do it. He must bring a clean instrument. If there was an embarrassment and broke, for example, a plate or a glass, do not worry. Just the restaurant will include its cost in the bill, and the case will be closed. No one will make scandals about this. If you want to salt the dish, and the salt shaker is on the other side of the table, you should not reach out for it yourself, you need to ask the neighbor just to serve what you need. It is also important to remember about decibels: you need to speak in a restaurant in a way that does not disturb others.

How to sit

Understanding how beautiful it is, it is important to remember that you need to sit at the table correctly. So, it is forbidden to put your elbows on the table, fall apart on a chair, swing on it. Also, you can not bend low over the plate. The back of the seated person should be straight, no need to slouch either. However, there should be no tension and rigidity in the posture, everything should be natural. When there is a change of dish, the guest is allowed to lean back a little so as not to interfere with the waiter and to rest a little in a comfortable position.

About food

It is worth remembering that it is not customary to rush in restaurants, meals are eaten slowly to enjoy them. palatability. If the food is quite hot, you can not blow on it. To cool down, you just need to wait a little, keeping the conversation going. If burning with burning food occurs, you can’t wave a napkin or hands into your mouth, you can only drink everything with water. Various bones, including fruit ones, are strictly forbidden to spit out or remove from the mouth with your hands. For this, a fork is designed, which is gently brought to the mouth and everything unnecessary is added there. If the person did not like the taste of the dish at all, you can bring a napkin close to your mouth and spit everything out there, without attracting the attention of others with indignation about this.

If you need to leave

The culture of behavior at the table has its own recommendations about mobile phones. So, if a guest is called, he can briefly say that he will call back without leaving his seat. However, if the conversation is urgent, be sure to move away. Talking at the table on the phone is a bad form. Also, if you need to leave, for example, to the restroom, you need to ask permission from everyone present at the table. You can also not talk to people sitting at the next table. If these are comrades or you just need to ask something, you need to get up and approach them. In the case when acquaintances enter the restaurant, they should be greeted sitting, with a slight nod of the head. A man gets up only if a lady joins his table. Women do not move in all situations.

End of meal

When the dinner has come to an end, the guests are full and satisfied, they can ask the waiter for the bill, which will mean that their stay in this institution has come to an end. The attendants will bring a folder in which the account will be indicated. It is also important to remember about the tip - 10% of the order value. Who should pay - that's another question. So, in the countries of the post-Soviet space, this is done mainly by men. In European countries, women are actively fighting this, considering it a relic of the past, and there everyone pays for himself. If the dinner was just friendly, you can ask the waiter in advance to bring a personal bill, for each person separately. It is also important to remember about surrender. If it is necessary, the person is simply silent. If there is money in the folder, part of which does not need to be returned, you just need to say: “Without change”, and this will be the end of the matter. It is important to remember that it is necessary to decide who will pay in advance, it is ugly to do this in front of the waiter. You also need to know who to complain to. To talk about everything that you liked or didn’t like, you need the head waiter, not the waiter.

Cutlery

But if all of the above is not too terrifying for the unknowing, then here's how to properly deal with cutlery - this is a whole science. After all, there are a huge number of plates, knives, spoons and glasses of various sizes and purposes. It is elementary to know how to properly hold the fork and how to use it. So, when a person sits down at a table, no matter where it happens - in a restaurant or at home, he must definitely look around. So, according to the rules, a snack plate should stand straight, to the right of it - a pie or napkin plate. To the left of the plate should be spoons and knives, to the right - forks. If all this is observed at the table, we can conclude that certain manners are required from the guest. You also need to remember that a dessert device will be located in front of the plate, most likely a teaspoon. Wine glasses and glasses will stand behind the plate, they all also have their own purpose.

How to use cutlery

So what is the right way to hold a fork? This question often worries people. It is worth remembering that those devices that lie to the left of the plate are taken with the left hand, those on the right - with the right. That's all science. Dessert devices are arranged so that the handle will look to the right or left. Depending on this, you need to decide which hand to take them with. As for the knife, according to the rules, the end of its handle should rest against the center of the palm, the thumb and middle finger are on the sides of the knife, and the index finger is in the center. The rest of the fingers are slightly bent towards the palm. The fork while eating is held so that its teeth look down, the handle, like that of a knife, rests on the palm. When you need to eat small pieces food, as well as a side dish - mashed potatoes or porridge, turn the fork upside down, while a knife can help in picking up food. The spoon is held in the left hand so that its end is at the base of the index finger, and the beginning is at the middle. If the dish is easily separated, the waiter can serve only the fork, in which case it must be held in the right hand. Now it should be clear to everyone, not only how to hold a fork and knife, but also other nuances of using cutlery. Moreover, it is not as difficult as it might seem at first.

Napkin

When figuring out how to eat beautifully, it is important to know that you also need to be able to manage with a napkin. Often it becomes the subject of table decoration, but at the same time it also has its direct purpose. Before eating, the napkin should be carefully folded in half and placed on your knees with the edge towards you. This will help protect your suit or dress from drips that might spill. You can also wipe your hands or lips with this napkin after eating or drinking. Hanging it by the collar, making a bib, is strictly prohibited. This is both inconvenient and very ugly. Soiled fingers are gently and imperceptibly wiped on the upper edge of the napkin, which remains on the lap. If you need to get your lips wet, the napkin is raised, however, so that it is completely in the palm of your hand, and not hanging. Blot (but do not wipe) the lips with the middle of the napkin, then it is placed back in place. It is strictly forbidden to use it as a handkerchief or towel for wet or dirty hands. Also, you can not wipe the cutlery with a napkin, looking for a speck on them. This can be great to offend the owners. If this item has fallen, you need to ask to bring a new one. At the end of the meal, the napkin is placed to the left of the plate, but never hung on the back of a chair.

About drinks

Everyone understands that proper behavior at the table is the key to a successful evening in a cultural institution. It is also important to give a few words and drinks, as well as the containers that suit them. The main thing is to remember the rule: the stronger the drink, the less capacity it needs. Glass - for vodka drinks, Madeira glass - for fortified, glasses or glasses for white and red wines, a glass or a glass - for champagne. First served over strong alcohol, then - in ascending order. The wine glasses are two-thirds full.

About children

Etiquette is also important, because kids should also be able to behave correctly in society. However, it should be said that the rules for them will be lighter and more restrained than for adults. And no one should pay much attention to the mistakes of the kids at the table. However, a mother or other parent should quietly make a remark to the baby, teaching him the right behavior. What is the most important thing for children when behaving at the table? It is important that the kids know that at the table you can not talk loudly, laugh, shout. You can not talk with a full mouth, it is ugly and even harmful to the process of eating. Also, you can not champ and smack, it is unacceptable. It is necessary for the child to be told how to properly handle the napkin: it should be used to wipe dirty lips and hands, and when not needed, it should be on your knees. Also, the baby needs to be told that there are dishes that you can eat with your hands, and those for which you need to use cutlery. For example, french fries, shrimp, fish sticks you can easily take it with your hands, you can also grab a cauliflower inflorescence. But this ends the list of products that are taken without appliances. For unknown reasons, babies love to eat spaghetti with their hands, but this is ugly and wrong. The kid needs to be told about this. Children should also remember that they need to stay at the table until everyone has eaten. And, of course, it is important to say “thank you” to the hosts who served. In the case of a meal in a restaurant, “thank you” is said to the head waiter. If etiquette at the table is too hard science for the crumbs, pictures can be a great help in learning. You just need to show the baby a few video tutorials or characteristic pictures, and everything will become clearer to him.

Master4ef

The rules of good manners at the table are instilled in us from early childhood. Knowing how to behave during a meal gives us self-confidence and the opportunity to show our best in society.

Norms and prohibitions in behavior while eating

  1. Most importantly, never talk with your mouth full. Not only does this look unaesthetic, but it also prevents you from expressing your opinion clearly.
  2. No need to try to bite as much as possible at a time. With a mouthful of food, you will not only look ugly, but also make you look like an ill-mannered person.
  3. It is also better to forget about the habit of biting bread. Bakery products you need to break off in small portions and put in your mouth.
  4. It is also important to remember that a meat dish does not need to be cut all at once. Only after eating one piece, you can cut off the next one.
  5. You can use your hands for poultry dishes if you hold a knife and fork with them.
  6. Fish bones also need to be pulled out with a fork. In rare cases, you can do it by hand. After that, they need to be wiped with a napkin, and not licked, as ill-mannered people do.
  7. Garnishes can be pricked on a fork, helping yourself with a piece of bread.
  8. If the dish is made from minced meat and they can be broken with a fork, then a knife can not be used.
  9. Eating with a knife is not only dangerous (you can get hurt), but also extremely indecent.
  10. Let us remind you once again of this important nuance like a fork in the left hand and a knife in the right. Even if you are so uncomfortable, it is worth practicing at home in advance. Confidence comes with practice.
  11. Do not use a spoon if the dish can be eaten with a fork.
  12. If you were served compote, then spitting bones from fruit directly into a plate is not the most best idea. To begin, bring the spoon close to your mouth to spit out the bone before placing it on your plate.
  13. Do not show your greed and take the biggest pieces. From a common plate, you should always take the piece that lies closest to you.
  14. In order not to embarrass your table neighbors, do not move dirty dishes to them.
  15. It is not customary to stretch across the entire table to the dish you like. Ask for it to be served to you.
  16. Bad habits like smearing leftover sauce or drinking it off the plate are also off limits.
  17. Always eat with your mouth closed to avoid making unpleasant sounds.
  18. Dirty cutlery should not be placed on the tablecloth. Leave them on the plate.
  19. Also, be careful not to send a tablespoon completely into your mouth.
  20. In no case, at the end of the meal, you can not lick the spoon, and even more so the plate.
  21. After you have stirred the sugar in the tea, the spoon should be removed from the cup.
  22. When serving a dish, do not pick at it, trying to see what it consists of, do not sniff or look closely at it.
  23. Even if you don't like the food at all, don't say it directly. It's best to refrain from commenting.
  24. In order not to show disrespect to the rest of the people sitting at the table, sit up straight, do not cross your legs.

Rules for using napkins at the table

  • If the napkin is made of fabric, then its purpose is solely to protect clothing from contamination. I do not need to wipe the dishes with such a napkin, wipe my massive lips or hands.
  • There are paper napkins on the table to clean hands and lips.
  • After eating, a cloth napkin is left on the side near the plate. Paper put on a plate rolled up.

It should be borne in mind that you can sit down at the table only after the invitation of the hostess. The duty of men is to help all women by pulling back a chair for each. You also need to make sure that your back is always straight. Do not stretch your legs under the table, do not put your elbows on the table - all this will not have the best effect on your reputation.

How to use cutlery

The ability to use cutlery is an integral part of the correct behavior at the table.

  1. If you still can’t remember the purpose of each of the devices, then use them in the order in which they are decomposed. Starting from the edges to the center.
  2. In order to put yourself something from a common plate, you need to use those devices that lie near this dish.
  3. When there is a change of dishes and a pause in the meal, the fork and knife are placed crosswise.
  4. At the end of the meal, the cutlery is placed on the plate in parallel.

Proper table manners includes much more than the above points. It is important to know not only table etiquette and be able to use the devices, but also to monitor their manners, behavior and ability to maintain a conversation.

Rules of behavior at the table for children

Table events are an exam for every person in knowledge of etiquette and good manners. Modern life is hard to imagine without going to a restaurant or visiting. Compliance with the rules will help both the guest and the host of the event to appear in society as an educated individual with properly instilled communication skills.

What it is?

Often the concepts of "ethics" and "etiquette" are equated or combined. Ethics has a broader meaning, speaking of it, one should keep in mind the personal moral and moral values ​​of the individual. Such traits of a person are brought up from early childhood. Usually the depth and strength of an individual's morality depend on interpersonal relationships in the family (family model), methods of education, efforts of educational institutions aimed at instilling good manners in schoolchildren, a friendly environment, personal character traits.


Etiquette is a set of specific rules that any well-mannered person must adhere to., these are the norms of behavior adopted by society for society as a whole or for a specific individual in particular. You can be a highly moral person with exceptionally correct moral values, but not know good manners. And vice versa.

Table etiquette is the rules of how a person should behave in a restaurant, guests, at a picnic, the order of relationships between a man and a woman, people of different ranks and ages at such events.

Any educated person should know the basics of table etiquette. Anyone who wants to achieve certain heights in life, get promoted on the career ladder, get into high secular circles - must learn and follow the rules of good manners thoroughly.


Norms and regulations

You can highlight the basic elements of how to behave during a feast. Such rules are known and understood by both children and adults. Therefore, you should start instilling good manners in yourself and the younger generation from the following basics:

  • Compliance with etiquette proxemics. Proper placement of guests at the table is important. Thus, the host of the event takes place at the head of the table, all important, honorable and senior guests are seated near the host on the right and left hand, youth and children at the opposite end of the table. Sometimes the youngest are given a separate children's table.
  • It is very important to keep track of what intonation prevails in the voice during a conversation, the timbre, volume, tone, speed of speech. The voice should sound clear, no need to speak too fast, loud exclamations are unacceptable. You can't talk with your mouth full.
  • At the table, you need to monitor your gestures and posture. You can’t fall apart on a chair, put your elbows on the table, sit with your hand resting your cheek, legs crossed, waving your arms, especially if there are appliances in them.
  • At the table, you can not start a conversation that can provoke an argument. Politics, religion, health and money are closed topics of conversation. Also, you can not discuss your diet, alcohol restriction and foods that you are allergic to. You should silently put aside an unsuitable dish, replace alcohol with any other drink.


  • A linen napkin should be spread on your knees, so contamination of clothes is excluded, and it is also possible to quietly wipe your hands on it.
  • You can start eating when everyone has food on their plates, and also after the host of the holiday starts eating.
  • If during the meal you come across a piece that cannot be chewed or a bone, you should quietly carry the napkin to your lips and remove the inedible element.
  • During the feast, you should turn off the phone or put it on silent mode. In no case should you put it next to the plate on the table.
  • A woman should put a handbag or clutch bag behind her on a chair, a large bag on the floor or hang it on the back of a chair. Sometimes restaurants offer a special chair for bags, you can use it. You can’t even put bags and packages on the table for a while.
  • If it fell to the floor cutlery or food, do not focus on this, you need to call the waiter and ask for a new one. You can not bend under the table and pick up a fallen object.
  • Do not use a toothpick at the dinner table. When there is a pause in the conversation, you need to apologize and leave the table. You can remove the stuck piece of food in the restroom.



The host of the event should not put toothpicks on the dining table; their place during the feast is the bathroom. The same rule applies if there is a need to clear the nose. Blowing your nose at the table while eating is indecent, and besides, this gesture will be unpleasant for other guests.

Good table manners

Before you go to an event, you should learn more about its nature. This can help in choosing an outfit, for women - also in choosing a hairstyle and makeup.

If the event is official, most likely all the guests were offered programs. They usually indicate the start time, the time of the entertainment or official part, the time of the buffet and the end of the evening.

Informal feasts are often more intimate and relaxed. Men can neglect ties, and ladies evening dresses to the floor. However, this does not exempt from observing the etiquette of behavior at the table.


A date in a restaurant: rules for a man and a woman

Usually, at the entrance to the restaurant, guests are met by a hostess or head waiter. An employee of the establishment offers his customers free tables and calls the waiter to take the order. If there is no such position, you can ask any waiter to help you choose a place or decide on your own. A man accompanies his lady to her place, usually on the left, helps to sit on a chair.

  • The waiter brings the menu and gives the guests time to make their choice. The right of primacy in the choice of dishes belongs to a woman. However, there is a common mistake that women often make. Saying "Order something to your taste" is absolutely impossible. Correct interpretation - “Advise what is better to order? ".
  • A man makes an order to the waiter after listening to the wishes of the woman.
  • Girls should not choose too cheap dishes, this can be a hint to a man that, in her opinion, he is not wealthy enough. But the choice of the most expensive meals in relation to a woman can cause unnecessary speculation.


  • The specifics of the restaurant should be taken into account. If the event takes place in a restaurant mediterranean cuisine, no need to order borscht or dumplings.
  • If the choice is difficult, you can call the waiter, clarify what ingredients are in the dish, what is the time of its preparation.
  • You should not address the waiter as "you", usually the employees of the institution have a name badge on which the name is written.
  • While waiting for the order, you should start a small talk. The topic of the conversation should be general, do not go into details and go deep. The interlocutors should look into each other's eyes, speak not loudly so as not to disturb others, and also create an intimate atmosphere of a date.
  • While the dishes are being prepared, the waiter can bring a bottle of wine as an aperitif. A male guest should not uncork it on his own, as well as pour a drink. This is the task of the waiter. In order to pour a second glass, it is not necessary to wait for the waiter. First, the lady is served, then the man can pour himself a drink. The glass should be filled to a little less than half.
  • The glass should be held with three fingers by the leg. Thus, it will remain as clean as possible, and this is important for the aesthetic component, which is key in the concept of etiquette.



  • To notify the waiter about the change of dish, you need to put cutlery obliquely on top of the plate. The fork and knife connected at the free end indicate that the meal is not over yet. It should be remembered that it is absolutely impossible to put cutlery on the table after use, their place is only on a plate.
  • You should not try your partner's dish. The only way to find out what it tastes like is to order the same.
  • In a restaurant, it is customary to eat slowly, enjoying the taste and process. Even if the feeling of hunger is very strong, you should follow the partner's pace, otherwise he will take it as an escape or a desire to leave the restaurant as soon as possible.
  • When dinner is over, the napkin is placed to the left of the plate.
  • The gentleman pays first. A woman should not interfere, ask “How much? ” or try to pay your half by putting money on a man.
  • If a man and a woman have friendly relations, payment of a 50/50 check is possible, then the man, having studied the check, tells the woman the amount of her order, and they agree on a tip.



Business meeting

In the modern world, business meetings are very often held in restaurants and cafes. This is especially true during international business visits. The host party introduces partners to the customs and culture of their country. In this case, the invited party should familiarize themselves with the traditions before the event so as not to offend their partners. Generally speaking, the following rules must be followed:

  • First of all, a business meeting is a solution to a business issue. If it does not take place at lunchtime, then you should limit yourself to a cup of coffee or tea.
  • When meeting with a partner, you should adhere to the main principle: time is money. You can start solving the issue immediately after the greeting, without being distracted by small talk.
  • After discussing the issue, you should briefly summarize the results of the meeting, if there is time left, move on to abstract topics in order to maintain personal relationships.
  • During international feasts, the inviting party pays. If a business meeting is limited to coffee or tea, then everyone pays for himself.


Customs around the world

Historically, food intake among different peoples of the world developed in its own way, taking into account national characteristics, household devices, the influence of conquerors, cultural and historical facts. In many countries, table etiquette rules overlap with each other. Thus, it is possible to single out a common international etiquette, but there is always a place for originality.

In Russia

Russia is a large international country in which all-European norms of behavior at the table are officially adopted. However, given that there are more than 190 nationalities in our country, traveling through it, you can meet unusual traditions and norms of behavior at the table.

Tatars attach great importance to etiquette proxemics at the table. The head of the family starts the meal first, only then the rest of the family and guests. They leave the table only when the head of the family has left. Praise be to Allah before and after the meal.



The peoples of the Caucasus have other features. Each family member has his own role, which must be observed without prejudice. It is worth noting important feature: men and women in the Caucasus do not eat together at the same table. Men eat first, then women and children.

Any large feast in the Caucasus must have a manager - "master of ceremonies". The oldest and honored guest of the event can become a toastmaster. He says toasts and gives the right to say a word to others. A Caucasian feast without toast is not a feast. They are distinguished by extraordinary splendor and exaltation of master's merits.

Among the Mongolian and Buryat peoples, the guest at the table is first offered a bowl of tea or vodka. The guest, taking a bowl, should stick the thumb of his right hand into the drink and sprinkle it towards the hearth. Interestingly, in some places this custom has really survived to this day. Of course, the customs of many peoples are gradually weakening, more and more families are beginning to adhere to European standards of etiquette.

However, when traveling across vast Russia, one should study the peculiarities of the life of local residents before going to one or another corner of the vast homeland. This knowledge is necessary in order not to offend or offend the owners, as well as to show respect for their culture and traditions.


In France

For those who are lucky enough to receive an invitation to dinner in France, it is worth knowing:

  • Lunch and dinner in France always starts with an aperitif, which is selected depending on the region. To drink a glass of wine, the French do not need a reason, they begin to drink a wine drink from adolescence. Wine is matched strictly to the dish that is expected. If it is fish - dry white wine, meat - dry red.
  • Usually the French eat out, as it is not customary for them to cook. In cafes, bistros and restaurants, meetings with friends, relatives, just family dinner. Sometimes men and women visit cafes to drink a cup of coffee and read a book or newspaper.
  • Family holiday dinners The French love it too. Usually they consist of several servings, each of which has several dishes. The filing process itself is carried out from right to left.
  • While the guests are being served a new dish, you can’t keep your hands under the table, on your knees - such a gesture can be regarded as distrust. You should lower your wrists to the corner of the tabletop.
  • Large feasts in the circle of close friends and relatives are held with a complex table setting, all generally accepted norms of etiquette are observed.
  • Be careful with the use of spices. Do not be too zealous - this may offend the hostess or the cook, since it can be assumed that the dish was not liked, that they want to “embellish” it.
  • In France, it is not customary to ask for more wine or a change of wine. The French believe that only a specific wine can be consumed with a specific dish. Also, do not add ice to a glass of wine. A change in temperature will affect the experience of the drink, and melting ice will change the taste.

In general, French etiquette has the same basic aspects as in Russia and throughout Europe. It is not customary to rush in the customs of this country, so the French are very attentive to all the table rules and strictly observe them, the guest of this country must also show respect for culture and remember about etiquette.

In England

The British are very scrupulous about the observance of etiquette, especially at the table. Even in the circle of close friends and relatives, dinner is held according to all the rules of good manners. It can be said that the main rule of etiquette in England is the observance of etiquette.


At the table, use the devices according to their purpose. The knife is held strictly in the right hand, the fork - in the left. It is not allowed to shift cutlery, in addition, the sharp end of the knife and fork always look towards the plate.

An unusual rule, but if the invited guest has an allergy to any ingredient or has special requirements for products, the hosts should be warned about this 2 days before the event. At a large table in England it is unacceptable to have an intimate conversation with only one guest, the topic should be common to everyone, and you should not contact a stranger.

You should not reach across the entire table to take a dish, you should ask to be passed. However, it is also not supposed to be transferred back; you must put the plate in an empty place next to you.

Every time a new dish is served to a guest, you should say "thank you". If there is a common dish on the table, you should not put too much on your plate, you need to put enough so that after the end of the feast the plate is clean. Otherwise, the host may consider that the guest did not like the dish.



In Korea

In Korea, it is also not customary to leave half-eaten rice on a plate or too much from another dish. Also, do not use a spoon and chopsticks at the same time, stir the soup with appliances, select certain pieces and separate them from the main dish. Lunch should be finished by everyone at the same time.

Sometimes in Korean restaurants the waiter serves the table without leaving it. His task is to ensure that guests always have food on their plates. Therefore, a satiated guest needs to leave a small piece of the half-eaten dish, which will become a signal that the supplement is no longer required. The same rule applies to drinks.

After the end of the feast, the sticks or spoon should be returned to their original position, where they lay before the start of the event. The bill is usually paid by the most senior at the table, and not every man for himself.



In China

The Chinese are very jealous of their traditions and customs, strictly follow them themselves and are very happy when foreign guests try to adhere to them.

The Chinese start their meal with flower tea. This drink acts as an aperitif and also entertains the audience until the rest of the invited guests arrive.

The Chinese, like the Russians, love to toast and drink alcohol at the table. During the toast, you need to stand, and then it is easy to clink glasses with the edges of the glasses. You can only drink from full dishes, if the glass is half empty, you should wait until it is filled by the one who is responsible for pouring drinks.

The Chinese will be very pleased if foreign guests use chopsticks while eating. And it is not necessary to hold them correctly. As convenient as it is right. However, use such traditional appliance very uncultured. Do not use sticks as a pointer, gnaw them, just put them in your mouth. Between meals, chopsticks lie on a special stand, you can’t leave them on a plate, and sticking them into food is insulting.

First, the first courses are served - soups, which are the only portions, then the "main meal" - rice or noodles, and dessert completes the evening. You should not lean heavily and overeat, a feast in China is an occasion to taste different dishes and enjoy their taste.


In Turkey

The national customs of Turkey are gradually being supplanted under Western influence. Restaurants and behavior there have completely switched to the rules of international etiquette. But in Turkish houses, you can still encounter the fact that the owners observe the peculiarities of life, personifying the history of the country.

For those who were invited to visit, you should know:

  • Coming to a Turkish house, you should take off your shoes on the threshold in front of the door. It is unacceptable to enter a house or apartment in street shoes.
  • Turks eat at a low round table, sit on the floor in Turkish style, their feet are hidden under the table top.
  • You should never refuse the offered food, it can offend the hosts. You should try at least a small piece and praise the dish.
  • Turks serve common meals on a tray. Each guest fills his plate with his hand or a spoon. You should not choose pieces "better" - this is also indecent.
  • The meal should be started after the approval of the head of the family.
  • The feast usually lasts at least two hours. The Turks follow the order of dishes, so after the main serving, tea, coffee, and sweets should be served. Eat slowly, enjoying the process.
  • It's not worth staying too long either. You should politely thank for lunch or dinner and leave.


Compliance with internationally accepted rules of etiquette is the best proof of good upbringing. Every country in the world appreciates good manners. Tourists and foreigners are often forgiven for ignorance of the peculiarities of the traditions and way of life of the country, but you should not abuse your position.

There are several rules that should be followed when visiting a foreign country or in an unfamiliar company:

  • You can bring dessert for tea and give it to the hostess at the meeting;
  • You should not sit down at the table before the host's invitation;
  • You should not start eating before the host starts;
  • No need to build a mountain of food on your plate, it is better to put a little bit of each dish, eat it, and only then reach for the supplement. This method will protect against overeating, and also allow you to leave the plate clean after yourself;
  • Do not ask too many questions to hosts or other guests;
  • You should always be modest and friendly, be sure to thank the hosts and note the culinary talent of the hostess.

In a difficult and incomprehensible situation, adhere to the principle of common sense. The main task is not to cause inconvenience to others, even if you have to sacrifice your well-being.